We aren't a soppy romantic couple. We don't do big displays of affection or sloppy Facebook posts. We tease others who do. We both know declaring we are the love of each others' lives, wind beneath our wings, that we are so in love and so happy is false.
We do love each other. We show our love by still being together. By occasionally offering to make a cup of tea, or an affectionate meeting of feet in the bed. It's a look across the room when we realise how cool yet weird our kids have turned out. It's laughing when one of us farts during sex. It's holding the fort at home whilst your wife is in hospital. It's managing alone when life just feels too much for your husband. It's apologising for being grumpy. It's taking the bins out and cleaning the toilet. It's pretending not to be annoyed that the other one didn't hoover today, or that one of you has spent our limited resources on a motorbike. It's making hard decisions about huge life changing things and things that in years to come won't matter at all.It's a conscious decision to put up with another annoying human. It's the just being together. It's listening to the other person's breathing slow before you go to sleep so you know they are safe and resting.
At our wedding, our curate preached on 1 Corinthians 13. We were semi christian then, and young. So young. Love never fails. Love is more than attraction. Love is more than admiration. Love is more than affection. He preached that attraction may fail with age. I'm sure I'm not as sexy now and I wasn't very sexy before! Admiration may fail. I'm sure there hasn't been much admiring how well I cope or parent, or how hard I work of late. Even affection can fail. Some nights I'm one step away from smothering him with a pillow to shut up the snoring. I'm certainly not wanting a cuddle. Love. Love never fails, and sometimes love is in the despair. Love is in the tears and the times when the future looks bleak and things couldn't be worse. Love is in the arguments. In the compromise. Love is in the grief. I appreciate our love my dear husband. I am thankful for our love. I am thankful that our love is a steady, everyday, commitment to putting up with each other type of love. A love that I see everyday without the need for cards, flowers and Facebook posts.
Our love is true love. In all it's messy and imperfect glory. Happy Valentines day xxxx
Pretty much exactly 5 months after my last church attendance I returned today. Since my last time I had only seen 3 people from the congregation face to face. People who live in my town. Who I've seen at least twice a week for years, I'd seen so few of them. Children had grown. Newborn babies now starting to move. Barely bumps now earth side. There were a few new faces too. We decided to go today because we had been invited for Sunday lunch by a couple from church. The sweet, kind hearted, godly doctor who was on duty the weekend I was first taken to hospital. I didn't give myself a choice this morning. I'd set up an excuse not to go for lunch already. Our car was broken. It was true, it was, but I knew it would be fixed in time to go. So I got up and we went. I'd spoken with my counsellor about not feeling it was my home any longer. That I wasn't part of the fellowship anymore. That physically I didn't know where to sit. Our usual seats, middle,front, with ...
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