International Day of Happiness

Oh how I wish I could have celebrated today better.

Oh how I long to feel happy. Feel content.

Tonight I have tried. I've searched for pictures to sum up my happiness. Looking for memories. Looking for those things that make me smile.

My son's first smile. My daughter on a bouncy castle. My son with a potty on his head. My children kissing me. They do make me smile. Fond smiles.

Smiles don't mean happiness though. Happiness is situational. Depression removes it. Spending international day of happiness a year into a suicidal depression is not funny.

I was happy once.

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